Tuesday, July 12, 2011

59 Ways to Kill a Shuttle

Bubble it.
Point it with a frigate.
Lure it into a trap.
Follow it until it pauses long enough to catch.
Bump it.
Distract it, then point it.
Yell at it in local, then point it.
Yell at it in local, then have your friends on the other side of the gate catch it.
Call a CTA.
Spam a fleet in channels then yell at ppl to join.
Join a nearby blue fleet to kill it, where the FC can’t speak your language.
Log your titan on to doomsday it.
Log your titan on to hot drop bridge on it with your fleet.
Chase it with your 100 man drake gang.
Role play that it is a disgrace to the Empire, and tell it so.
Smartbomb it.
Follow it using a complicated set of jump bridges, and get ahead of it.
Report it in all intel channels.
Report it in local.
Report it on your voice coms. (Be sure to yell “Check, Check” first!)
Tell your blues to start a gang.
Send your drones to kill it.
Send your corpmates to kill it. (If different then above.)
Shoot missiles at it….at every gate for 30 jumps…
Chase it in your dramiel, but run away if it approaches. (Give it a false sense of security.)
Convo the pilot and ransom it for 50 million ISK.
Create bookmarks in every direction, 250k away, then warp between them, confusing it.
Snipe it from far away.
Learn where it lives…and camp it. Forever.
Declare war against it. (Be sure to state your intentions on the forums!)
Place a bounty on its head.
Place a spy in its midst, then secretly kill it.
Pretend to be a miner, then kill it at the last minute.
Pretend to be a rock, then kill it at the last minute.
Pretend to be the gate, and kill it when it tries to jump through you.
Pretend to be the station, and kill it when it tries to dock in you.
Send an Amarrian to scorch it.
Send a Minmatar to project at it.
Send a Gallente to hurtle hybrids at it.
Send a Caldari to throw rocks at it.
Swallow it up with your freighter.
Drop a cyno jammer in its system, then kill it.
Take pop shots at its pos to annoy it, then kill it.
Troll it on the forums.
Scam it in Jita.
Drop 10 suicide battleships on it in high sec.
Attack it from the sun…so it cant see you.
Bomb it in your SB.
Scram and Jam it with your Falcon until help arrives. (Be sure to use the correct racial jammer)
Call for backup.
Lure it into a wormhole.
Box it in, and kill it slowly.
Wait until your entire fleet has a point on it, then instapop it.
Invite it into your corp then kill it.
Create a NAP with it then kill it.
Make it pay you to create a NAP with it, then kill it.
Kill it, then analyze the killmail, looking for weaknesses and different future strategies for killing shuttles.

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